Hand Carved Memorials and Headstones - helping with bereavement

Hand carved headstone Commissioning a memorial can be a very difficult and emotional process for most people. However a memorial should be a celebration of the life of a loved one, and provided the whole process is treated with sensitivity and compassion, the experience can be really helpful and comforting. My clients often write to me of the joy the finished memorial or headstone has given them, and how much the memorial reflects the character of their loved one. Achieving this is for me one of the most satisfying aspects of my work; getting it right. Translating what the client remembers of their loved one into stone when they do not always know at all what they want at first is always a challenge. I achieve this by listening to client and taking our time; it is a matter of team work. Quite often the client will have an idea of the design in their mind and it is up to me to make it work. Nothing is rushed, and indeed I usually encourage clients to wait at least a year or two after their loss before coming to me. Time enables the clients’ emotions to settle a little, and they gain more clarity about the sort of headstone or memorial they want.

When a client first walks into my workshop to discuss a memorial, they are often very emotional. This is understandable, as they are confronting their loss, and it can be hard to talk openly with a stranger. It is for this reason that my clients really appreciate only having to speak with one person about the memorial. I offer a very personal experience, and a very close working relationship is struck up with my clients. My memorials are all handmade; each is entirely unique, and to achieve my aim, I need to work closely with the client, so that they often have a large input into the final headstone design. I sometimes ask clients to send me information about their loved one in advance; a memorial must reflect not only their character, but also the sentiments of their family who miss them, and thus again the close partnership with the client is essential.

Being handmade, the possibilities for memorial and headstone design are endless; almost anything that can be pencilled onto paper can be translated onto a headstone. I am always careful however to maintain a strength, dignity and simplicity in my memorials, so that they endure and stand the test of time.

After our meeting, I send the client a detailed sketch of the memorial which they can then amend as they wish; sometimes we have to start all over again with a new design. The important thing is to get the memorial just right. Once a design has been approved, both by the client and the churchyard, I pencil it out onto the stone, and invite the client to return to the workshop and view the pencilled out memorial before I begin cutting.

Clients who commission a memorial from me feel very much involved in the whole process, from inception, to completion, some even wishing to be present when I fix the memorial in place. I am able to see clients on weekends and evenings; I do not have set opening hours, so clients are able to contact me at any time to ask how their memorial is progressing.

The end result is a handmade memorial which will stand the test of time, which will endure and will capture the essence and sentiments of the loved one and the client, who will hopefully feel a sense of calm, happiness and relief when the headstone or memorial is in place. This is my ultimate goal.

Posted on 12th January 2009 in Headstones